my mom meant to post a picture of her dog and posted a picture of a turkey instead
(where can i get this woman’s magic lesbian summoning powers?)
You can’t buy lesbian summoning powers, you’re born with it. Too bad for you kid
Pros of being gay: both you and your wife would get into the lifeboats on the titanic.
Considering starting The Cersei Lannister Diet, which is basically just red wine and your own disappointment in the human race.